I feel as though this part of my journey through my life has come with some set-backs. I’ve been stuck looking at my life based on the things I would like to accomplish, I understand that we all have a purpose, and each person has a different role to play. I even understand and know that I’m right where I need to be, I’m here in this place because I’m needed here. I also accept that I’m here because I have the right resources and support to get through it. I believe that my best days are ahead, and that there is something amazing waiting for me ahead. Despite all of those positive thoughts, it doesn’t stop the thoughts about the things I’ve not accomplished from creeping into my mind. I will continue to move forward, taking it one day at a time. I decided to write today because I wanted to share the mental turmoil I seem to be struggling with. How do I re-frame where I am so that I can have a more positive outlook?
Rather than looking at my life from the perspective that I’m not married, have children, or own a home; after all those are some of the most important measures of success! I wanted to re-frame my view of my life, to see myself from a new view. This past weekend just about every conversation I’ve had, or blog post, or article I’ve read seems to point to one idea, sometimes you need to change your perspective. I was sharing some of my thoughts with my brother earlier in the week, he thought I was crazy for thinking the way I was. The way he saw it was that I’ve moved to a new City, found work to keep me here for 9 years, made new friends, and have began to fully understand who I am. For him, those are things worth being proud of. I did explain that I didn’t think I was a complete failure, it’s just sometimes negative thoughts seem to outweigh all the positive ones. By re-framing how we both saw the same situation, that got me thinking, and of-course I kept seeing that same message through-out the weekend. The one that resonates the most with me is from a TV show I saw today, COSMOS. In this show they explored our universe, and how it came to be. In the opening episode they talked quite a bit about our planet in relation to it’s position in the known Universe, and on the time continuum. When our existence is measured against such a vast back drop, we seem quite small. One of the concepts they spoke about that really got me thinking was from a Roman Poet Lucretius Carus; he suggested what was a revolutionary thought for his time. The universe can be viewed as being infinite, or it’s only has big we can see. He suggests that what we see is a kind of a wall that our arrow hits, and if we were to climb over that wall, our arrow would be shot off into infinity, or into another wall; then the process repeats itself.
Perhaps I’m at that wall right now, so when I climb over it, I could either go on into infinity, or come to face another wall. By looking at where I am as a wall, instead of being blocked by it, why not climb over it and see what lies ahead. That got me thinking of how we perceive happiness, most people think that once they’re married, have kids, or own a home, they will be happy. The reality is that once you’ve gained those things, you find that you have another wall to climb and peer over. In life there’s never a point where you’ve reached a destination in happiness, then you never have to face unhappiness again. What life has thought us is that happiness is in each moment, and we have to work to maintain it. I’m not satisfied with my life right now, so I should work to getting that satisfaction. There will be days when things are great, and there will be days when I struggle. Instead of coming up to a wall and just giving up, I have to climb over it, and see what lies ahead. With each new discovery, a wonderful new undiscovered world lies ahead.
As I got away from negative thoughts and started thinking more positively, I noticed a subtle change. I didn’t feel tense, angry or frustrated. There was a calming uplifting feeling, my muscles were less tense, and I felt this amazing happy feeling from deep within. Thinking positively had a healthy relaxing feeling on me, I din’t feel stressed and tense anymore. So aside from seeming crazy and annoying to people because you’re happy and don’t let negative thoughts get you down, thinking positive seemed to have a healthy effect. I understand that this is not a revolutionary thought by any stretch of the imagination; but for me it’s an acceptance of it’s benefits for me. What about you, how can changing your perspective help in your life? Are you viewing where you are as just from our solar system, perhaps you should be thinking bigger, maybe you should be looking at it from the Galaxy point of view. How can changing your perspective bring positive, and calming feelings to your life?